Lemon Warfare

Q1: What is the most potent weapon when your adversary is your neighbour and is off guard?
A: A Lemon, preferably injected with some vermilion water, embellished with arbitrary chants and cut into two.

Q2: How is the weapon employed?
A: One way is to generally throw it on the houses of the neighbours when they are asleep. The most important part of this process follows. Which is wait until your neighbours get run over by an African elephant making out with a Mexican Chihuahua, or wait until they become Walrus fodder, or just wait until a nuclear bomb destined to Pluto loses way and ends up in the commode of your adversary.

Q3: How did I come upon this ingenious and marvellous idea?
A: My neighbours employed this rather powerful weapon upon us. Now I am worried and shit scared whenever I get out of home. Especially when I go to office. Who knows? A lurking gay Yeti might just spring out of the Bangalore City Corporation building and decide to molest me....

Somebody help me!

PS: Forgot to say, is the Indian Army listening???